You know whats on my mind 24/7 all day, every day.. escaping.. Where’s the nearest blunt or the nearest bottle, where’s my favorite razor at and where’s that feeling of being happy. Happy CLEARLY does not exist anymore and honestly I CAN NOT remember the last time I was happy, the last time I didn’t cry or the last real smile on my face. Everything about me is fake, my hair isnt it’s natural color, my teeth were never this straight, I wear glasses but choose not to wear them, my clothes aren’t me. The smile, the make up, THAT ISNT ME. It’s my image but it isnt me. You know life always knocked me down but some how I always found away to get back up. Never knew how Id do it. From bruises to bruises, from heartache to heartache from leaving to leaving and from mental and physical abuse, How did I do it because right now I need that strength back but honestly there is nothing left of me. I just some hopeless girl who has just given up, who can hardly see the keyboard cause her eyes are filled with tears and her hands are shaking on every key. Who would ever love a girl that “needs help” when no one ever takes the time to help her. Some STUPID, UGLY, WORTHLESS, PIECE OF SHIT, CRAZY girl.. no one wants that. She’s been called them names so many times that it’s sunk to her brain that, that is what she is that now. Even she calls herself that bc others around her made her believe it was true.
